Lost

I am sure everyone has experience in losing something, or maybe someone. The feeling is disastrous, devastating and upsetting. I just had this kind of feeling last Friday night…

The story begins with me plugging my USB cable from my handphone to my computer. As usual, the connection is troublesome and I always have to make adjustment till the connection is well established. Unfortunately, this time my computer is unable to recognize the cable and the connection is interrupted all the time. Thus I plug away the cable and BOOM… No explosion, of course, but I find my phone lying on the table, blinking its screen. I turn it off and hope it will resolve to its normal state. However it doesn’t help, it continues blinking and technically malfunction. I hold my phone and tell myself not to panic. So I try to reconnect it to my computer and see what will happen. Nothing miraculous event happens, the screen still blinking. Oh, suddenly I remember I still have the box that contained booklet regarding the phone when I bought it. I dig it out and start reading almost every single page, but it doesn’t help. That’s the first point I want to convey in this post. Normally when we newly bought some equipment or appliances, nobody will care to read the manual as long as it is working. What will make us read the booklet is when something goes wrong, which is considered quite late to read by that time. At the same time, don’t expect all the questions can be answered in the booklet because I read it thoroughly a few times but still cannot find a solution for my problem.

Back to my story, I start to panic and I can feel adrenaline is gushing into every inch of my blood vessels. I look at the phone and frown, this is a new phone which I bought 3 months ago, how can it just spoil like that? For years I support sony erricson as if I am their biggest fan, and now I just lose my confident to this company. Second point, what you trust may end up what you hate. No further elaboration, think it in your own way.

So after that, I call James using Thrance’s phone, hoping that he will be my phone savior. He looks at it, pokes here and there, then shrugs in the end. I sit next to him, silently sobbing in my heart, how could this happen to me? James doesn’t know how to comfort me, but he lends his second phone for me to use temporally till I get my phone fixed. Third point, the first person you think of when you have trouble definitely is your best friend and you will suddenly see them as your savior in this time of crisis, even though you know they can’t do much also. Then for the rest of next day, I dip myself into the mood of depression. I start to blame a lot of factors, but I know it’s all my fault, maybe majority it’s the phone own problem, hehe! I bring out the lecture note and attempt to study, but I can’t concentrate. So I turn on all my emo, sad songs and hope this would sooth my sore heart. Not helping too! Fine, I change all my playlist to instrumental music and see if it could help. While the songs are playing, I try to read my notes again after reminding myself of the upcoming exam. Then miracle slowly comes in… my mood is getting better, in fact I stop pitying myself and the whole depression thingy just past behind my mind. Furthermore, the current playing music exactly suits my feeling. I quickly look at the playlist, guess what, it is playing Final Fantasy: The Advent Children OST- Cloud Smiles. I never notice this song is so relaxing until I have this exaggerated depression mode. Point #4, notice every single tiny thing that surround you, maybe it helps you to move on.

Because of this event, I just realize that my life has been so simple and calm. I don’t have much experience in dealing unfortunate events, especially mental challenge. I am turning 21 soon, yet I feel so immature and there are still lots of thing for me to learn and acquire. Life is all about adapting, and I am sure I can fully take charge of my life soon.

For maturity, cheerz!